


Crooked Shadows

by fridaysblues (taemin)



Series: In Pursuit of Happiness AU [4]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Music, Biology Inaccuracies, Family, M/M, Mpreg, Slice of Life, Somebody buy these assholes a box of condoms, Unplanned Pregnancy, Weird Biology, complicated mpreg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:47:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22286626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taemin/pseuds/fridaysblues
Summary: "We’ll have another adventure. We've done this before. We sort of know what we're doing now, don't we?"Or: Same song, different verse.
Relationships: Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Park Chanyeol
Series: In Pursuit of Happiness AU [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/388891
Comments: 27
Kudos: 116





	Crooked Shadows

**Author's Note:**

> For Grazi.

The door is unlocked when Kyungsoo gets home from work, which is handy when Minsu's strapped to his chest and fussing. They'd waited at Kenmore for over half an hour before a train came along with enough space to allow them to board and Minsu's overdue for a nap. Kyungsoo’s tired enough that he’s considering one for himself, but he’ll have to skip it. There’s too much to do for the party tomorrow.

They can follow the path Chanyeol took to the bedroom by the trail of discarded clothing like bread crumbs. The suitcase next to the door, a pair of slip on sneakers here, his jeans draped over the couch, and puzzlingly, a sweatshirt turned inside out and dropped in front of the fridge, like he'd doubled back to get a glass of water during the process.

"Your daddy," Kyungsoo says to Minsu, rolling his eyes, "needs to learn how to pick up after himself before you start walking."

"Daddy?" Minsu echoes absently, his tiny fingers yanking at the collar of Kyungsoo's dress shirt. He calms down a little at the invocation of Chanyeol's name, but the tired pout's still there, holding steadfast.

Kyungsoo finds Chanyeol in their bedroom, stripped to his underwear and burritoed in the comforter which he seems to have pulled entirely off Kyungsoo's side of the bed. He's snoring, loudly.

"Hey, Chanyeol. Get up," Kyungsoo says, not unkindly. He deposits Minsu on the bed next to the bundle of sheets and lets him clamber all over Chanyeol's prone form, not really caring where his pointy little elbows happen to jab. "We're supposed to have dinner with your parents tonight, and you need to shower first."

After a long pause, Chanyeol cracks an eye open and Kyungsoo can tell immediately that he's not feeling well. The expression on his face is downright pathetic, even as he tries to push it aside to greet Minsu hello, hand resting gently across the width of his back to keep him from falling off the edge of the bed.

"Dinner?" he croaks, sounding very close to death's doorstep.

"They wanted to do something special for Minsu's birthday... you remember, don't you?"

Chanyeol closes his eyes, unusually devastated, and Kyungsoo can see the profound disappointment in himself flicker across his face. He's the one who keeps track of dates in the household, meticulous with receipts and coordinating schedules. He remembers everyone's birthday, every holiday, every appointment. This isn't like him at all. "Shit," he says quietly. "I totally forgot. I'm sorry. What time is it? I got home, and just came straight to bed, I didn't even unpack—"

"I saw." Kyungsoo strokes his hair off his forehead. "You're really out of it. Are you feeling okay?"

Chanyeol blinks a few times. He's unusually pale, even after taking into account the fact that he's been spending a lot of time under artificial lights in dark recording studios for the past few months. "No. I think I picked up a bug at the airport or something," he says. "I felt awful all week."

"Do you want me to cancel plans?"

Chanyeol sighs. "They'll hate that. You know they were looking forward to spending time with Minsu." He squints up at Kyungsoo. "Do you feel up to going by yourself?"

"They'll be here tomorrow, and I don't know if I should leave you here," Kyungsoo says. "Are you going to make it?"

"I'm just going to go back to sleep," Chanyeol says. "I'm sure I'll feel better in the morning."

"Can you call your mother first, at least?" Kyungsoo asks, retrieving Minsu before he crawls over Chanyeol's shoulders and tumbles into the edge of the nightstand. "Let her know what's going on?"

Chanyeol gropes around under his pillow and retrieves his phone. "Sure," he mutters, eyes closed. "I'm sorry. Thank you."

"Just to be clear, this is the 'in sickness' part of the vows, right? So I have to be nice to you?"

Chanyeol laughs at that, which makes Kyungsoo feel a little bit better about the whole thing.

—

When he arrives at the Park residence later that evening, Yura's there too. She'd driven up for the weekend from Washington DC to come to Minsu's first birthday party tomorrow. She scoops Minsu into her arms and kisses his face until he squeals with delight and says, " _Oo-lah_!" which is as close as he can get to her name for now.

"So where's Chanyeol?" she demands, bouncing Minsu on her hip. "When I texted him yesterday he promised he was going to make it back in time."

"He's back in the city, but he's at home in bed. He looks like shit. I think he picked up the flu from all of the airports he's been in lately."

She clucks disapprovingly. "Still, he usually manages to come for dinner even when he's sick. He never says no to Mom's cooking."

"Yeah, I know. That’s how I could tell he wasn’t lying just to get out of coming. I think the traveling really wore him out. He fell asleep again before I left. He's definitely in bad shape. I hope he'll be better in time for tomorrow."

"Maybe he's pregnant," Yura jokes. She must see the stricken look on Kyungsoo's face because she immediately starts hedging. "Kyungsoo, it's a joke, I was kidding. I know you guys have your hands full with this one." She blows a raspberry on Minsu's cheek, setting off his giggles again.

Kyungsoo shakes it off with a wobbly smile, but he's counting back weeks in his head, trying to remember when the last time—oh, shit. Spring break. Second week of March. A little over a month ago. They'd dropped off Minsu for a night with Kyungsoo's parents and they'd gone out to New York to catch Jongdae's show for his first solo EP at some tiny club in the city. There'd been dancing, and a lot of drinking, and he'd even gotten up onstage with Chanyeol and Baekhyun for a few impromptu performances of their old songs. He'd been a mess, Chanyeol had been worse, and they couldn’t wait to go back to the hotel, especially not when Chanyeol was begging to be fucked in such graphic detail it was making Kyungsoo overheat.

So, stupid and giggling and horny, they’d locked themselves in the club's bathroom to fuck, Kyungsoo muscling Chanyeol against the sink, bent over, pants down around their knees. He had to get up on his toes to grind up into Chanyeol, deep and filthy, hands braced on Chanyeol’s hips hard enough to leave bruises. He’d yanked Chanyeol back by the hair to watch their reflection as they moved together, sweaty from dancing, from sex, and for a while it felt like old times, how it was between them before, laughing and sticky and completely disgusting. It had all been over fairly quickly, but Chanyeol still had his hands all over Kyungsoo for the rest of the night, whispering in his ear about the pair of ruined underwear he’d left in the trash on their way out of the bathroom.

It was, in short, just like the last time. Except in reverse.

"Yeah, ha," he says, trying to muster a smile, relieved that she can't read his mind right now because the thoughts he's having are both frantic and filthy. "Wouldn't that be hilarious?"

— 

He slips out right after dinner instead of lingering over tea the way they usually do on these Friday night dinners. Chanyeol's mother sends him back with a whole bag of side dishes. Chanyeol's family is especially consistent, always spoiling them with food from their restaurant. He's gotten decent at preparing meals but the side dishes sent home from either of their households are always so much better. He can't figure out what they're doing to make it taste so good, some kind of mother magic, but he's not complaining. He's a willing beneficiary to this particular system and he'll never say no to free food.

The lamp is on in their bedroom, but he can't hear anything and Chanyeol doesn't greet him at the sound of the key in the lock, so he assumes Chanyeol's still asleep and doesn't bother him. He puts the food away and gets Minsu settled in his crib and down for the night. He can't shake Yura's joke. It seems impossible, but there's a baby in the next room asleep with his thumb in his mouth who was also _impossible_ right up until he wasn't anymore.

Chanyeol _does_ stir when Kyungsoo turns off the lights in the living room and comes into their bedroom. "Hey," he says, yawning. His hair is cowlicked from sleep and he looks so cute it actually pisses Kyungsoo off a little bit. "How was dinner?"

"Are you pregnant?" Kyungsoo demands, skipping over the question. Chanyeol cracks up.

"Am I what? Are you drunk?"

Kyungsoo suddenly feels ridiculous. He sits down on the edge of the bed. "It's just, you're sick, and we were a little out of control after Jongdae's spring show—"

"Oh, yeah. That was pretty hot," Chanyeol says, still sort-of laughing deep in his chest. "I love it when you get rough with me." He's hugging onto Kyungsoo's pillow for dear life and he looks like he could sleep for another sixteen hours, easily. "What makes you think that?"

"Yura—I don't know, she asked when she heard you were sick, and I never questioned it. But now I'm—I'm being paranoid, aren't I?"

"You are," Chanyeol agrees, accepting the kiss on his sweaty forehead with a pleased smile. "I spend half my days breathing recycled air. This isn't the first time I've been a little run down, and it won't be the last. And besides, we weren't planning on another one."

"I know we weren't, but we weren't even planning on the first one, if you recall."

Chanyeol lifts an eyebrow, still grinning. "True."

"Never mind. It's stupid. I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't totally going crazy."

"We can think about it, if it's really on your mind," Chanyeol says, pulling Kyungsoo close with a handful of his shirt. He's half-hard in his underwear. Kyungsoo laughs and steadies him with a palm braced against his chest.

"Whoa there. Aren't you sick?"

"Only a little. You're going to catch it anyway. I’ve been breathing all my germs on your side of the bed so you can suffer with me. Come on. Minsu's down for the night, time to make you bite through a pillow."

Kyungsoo's laugh peters out into shallow breathing when Chanyeol's fist closes around his cock, warm and a little rough, stroking upwards until he's closing his eyes because it's too much to maintain eye contact with Chanyeol when he's doing this. He'll come too soon, otherwise.

"How do you want it?" Chanyeol murmurs in his ear.

"Your mouth—your fingers," Kyungsoo says, grabbing the bottle of lube out from underneath the pillow and flinging it somewhere in the middle of the bed where it bounces and lands.

"What's the rush? You're so close already," Chanyeol notes, laughing, his voice scratchy and tired. And _god dammit_ , Kyungsoo thinks, pushing his hips up into Chanyeol's open mouth, he's absolutely going to catch this fucking cold Chanyeol's brought home as a souvenir but he forgets to be bothered when a pair of slick, wet fingertips tuck into his asshole and he's trapped in between Chanyeol's mouth and his hands, warm and large and steady, holding him down to the bed. Kyungsoo can't bite back his groans in time and makes a sound loud enough to wake the neighbors when he comes.

"Good one?" Chanyeol asks, wiping his fingers off on a tissue. "Haven't heard you make that sound in a while. Can I still fuck you?"

"Yeah," Kyungsoo says, wrapping his arms around Chanyeol's neck, overheating and still buzzing, muscles loose. "Yeah, go on, please, fuck me." He's not fully hard again yet but he still wants it anyway, wants to feel Chanyeol inside him because it's honestly been far too long, what with Chanyeol being out of town all the time and the kid taking up a lot of their energy. He thinks the last time they did anything except trade hand jobs under the covers before Jongdae's album release was New Year's? Or maybe even Christmas? He can't remember, which means it's long past time.

Chanyeol rolls him over onto his hands and knees and then pauses while he fumbles around in the side drawer for a condom. His breathing is labored and it takes him much longer than it usually does to locate one, rip open the foil packet, and roll it on himself. Kyungsoo runs his hand up Chanyeol’s arm, head still hanging, waiting, anticipating.

"You okay?" he asks after a moment, listening to the muted crinkle of foil as Chanyeol tosses the wrapper aside.

"Yeah, yeah," Chanyeol says, shaking his head a few times. The ends of his hair brush against Kyungsoo’s bare back. He tries again, gamely, and gets there this time in one smooth thrust. Kyungsoo gasps loudly, the aching stretch a familiar relief. He's already on his way to rock hard again the minute Chanyeol pushes inside of him. He can definitely come again if they do this long enough, so he’s going to make this one count, rocking back against him with awkward, sloppy thrusts, rutting against the mattress, remembering what it used to be like. They used to have all the time in the world for this sort of thing, back when Kyungsoo was less conscious about keeping his volume low enough to avoid waking a baby.

He reaches behind him, trying to pull Chanyeol deeper and urge him to keep going, _harder_ , but Chanyeol slows instead and rests his forehead against the nape of Kyungsoo’s neck. He kisses the skin there, breathing ragged and loud as he struggles to catch it.

"Shit," Chanyeol whispers, and at that moment Kyungsoo feels it too—Chanyeol’s going soft inside him. He pushes back gamely a few times, trying to get it back, but it's no use. Chanyeol groans, slipping out, and slowly tips himself back onto the mattress to stare up at the ceiling with a defeated expression.

"It's okay," says Kyungsoo, stiff cock still wet and leaving damp smears over the sheets. He rolls over, trying his best to hide it with the top sheet, not wanting to draw attention to his obvious boner when Chanyeol's so upset. Chanyeol peels the condom off and flings it menacingly towards the trash can in their room. It misses.

"No, it's not okay—I wanted to come, dammit," Chanyeol huffs, hand caressing Kyungsoo's dick with a practiced palm, "and you—god, you look so good right now, what a waste. I'm so sorry. It’s not because your ass isn’t hot."

"I know," Kyungsoo says, chuckling a little at the unnecessary assurance.

Chanyeol kisses him again, frowning, his frustrated sigh fanning across Kyungsoo's lips, chasing the heat that usually comes so easily and so plentifully between them. "Been thinking about fucking you since I left last week, just wanted to spend the whole night inside you—fuck you so hard you feel it tomorrow—fuck your tight ass wide open—" He's trying to rev himself up with dirty talk and it's admirable, but it's also not working tonight. His cock stays soft. It's probably not supposed to be endearing but it is, at least to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo pets it with the backs of his fingers, trying not to be patronizing, which is hard to do when you're stroking the ridge of your husband's flaccid dick and biting back a smile.

"What if I finish up by myself and you watch?" Kyungsoo asks, digging around under the pillow for the bottle of lube again. "You can join in any time if you feel like it." He used to be self-conscious about this kind of thing, but he's grown bold over the past year with the way Chanyeol's eyes go dark and hungry, never with a trace of judgment, just pure, distilled want. 

Chanyeol assents with a kiss, slipping a finger in next to Kyungsoo's to help him along. He pushes harder than he did before, then introduces a second finger, and Kyungsoo withdraws his hand and allows Chanyeol to take over. Kyungsoo lies back and lets him go, moaning softly, stroking Chanyeol's hair away from his face to kiss his forehead. Chanyeol knows Kyungsoo's body better than any instrument he plays, knows where to rub tight circles with the pads of his fingers until Kyungsoo’s holding onto scalp-stinging fistfuls of hair, hips bucking. It's over relatively quickly, and it's small—a few valiant spurts, warm against Kyungsoo's skin. It still feels so good. Kyungsoo probably couldn’t walk straight right now if he tried. His knees feel like jelly just lying here. Does he even have legs anymore? He glances down to make sure they're still there.

"Sorry," Chanyeol says mulishly, eyebrows drawn together. Kyungsoo dabs at the shiny spots on his stomach with a tissue. 

"For what?"

"It wasn't—I don't usually _fail to perform_ like that," he grumbles, cheeks burning. 

"No complaints here. I just got off twice." Kyungsoo offers him a crooked grin, even in the face of Chanyeol's sad pout. He looks so much like their son when he pulls that face. "At least I know you're tired and you weren't faking it to get out of dinner tonight."

Chanyeol scowls.

"Hey. Come on. I'm kidding." Kyungsoo’s voice softens. "Raincheck. As soon as you're feeling better. We'll get a sitter. You can—what was it? ' _Fuck my tight ass wide open_ '? God. So romantic. So glad I had your baby. You have the soul of a poet."

This seems to appease Chanyeol, at least slightly. He settles back against his pillow, already looking worn-out and half-asleep again. "Overnight?" he asks, sounding hopeful.

"It's not your birthday," Kyungsoo teases, switching off the light next to them. The room goes dark, and Chanyeol pulls Kyungsoo back into him by the hip, bare bodies slotting together comfortably. He soothes himself by stroking down Kyungsoo's side, cupping his ass, pulling him closer. His wedding ring is cold on Kyungsoo's skin and he shivers, cuddling closer.

He's definitely going to catch whatever it is Chanyeol's got. Fuck him. And yet—

"I love you," Chanyeol murmurs, nose pressed into the delicate fold of Kyungsoo's ear. "Really, really love you."

It’s okay. It’s worth it for this.

"Can you believe our kid's a whole year old?" Chanyeol continues, his voice quiet and rumbly, his words all running together. "This time last year, it was our last night together, just the two of us."

Kyungsoo hushes him and hooks his arm under Chanyeol's elbows to cuddle him. Pressed together like this, Chanyeol doesn't feel especially feverish, but the fatigue is undeniable. He's nearly fast asleep right away although he tries his best to fight it. 

"No. Wait. Talk to me first. I missed you so much this week. I always miss you," Chanyeol whines, always the most open and vulnerable when he's sleepy.

"I missed you too. How was Los Angeles?" Kyungsoo asks, feeling a little envious at the thought of it. It's still chilly here in Boston, the last vestiges of winter hanging on for dear life. It hasn't transitioned properly into spring just yet, which means it's fleece-jacket-and-jeans weather most days. He's still been bundling Minsu up in his winter coat, which is already a little too small for him, but he doesn't want to buy him a new one just yet when he'll inevitably be too big for it once the next winter is here. He'd watched the weather forecasts for Los Angeles on his phone the entire week Chanyeol was away working, grimacing with envy at the eighty degree temperatures and the promises of blue skies.

"It was good," Chanyeol slurs, sounding mostly-asleep already. "I booked another gig with them for the end of May, too."

"Cool," Kyungsoo says, tracing slow patterns into the small of Chanyeol’s back, trying to coax him the rest of the way asleep. "For how long this time?"

"Two weeks. You should come. Bring Minsu. We'll have a vacation, sort of."

"Yeah, let’s do that. That sounds good," Kyungsoo says, already imagining the sunshine and Minsu’s face the first time they’ll take him to splash in the Pacific Ocean.

—

Chanyeol’s still sluggish the next morning. He sleeps two hours past Kyungsoo's alarm and refuses breakfast when he finally does drag himself out of bed, looking grey-faced and queasy. Instead, he sits on the couch wrapped in the comforter like a cape, staring at a point just past the muted television, not really watching anything in particular. He looks a little bit like a zombie. Kyungsoo feels awful just looking at him.

Normally, Kyungsoo would drop everything and sit with Chanyeol when he's feeling that lousy, but they're about to be swarmed with dozens of party guests, and the apartment's still not ready. Kyungsoo vacuums the living room _again_ and stuffs the forgotten six packs of beer in the bottom of the fridge in the hopes that they'll have something adjacent to cold beer by the time guests arrive. He's in the middle of getting Minsu changed and ready for the guests to arrive when Chanyeol shuffles in, rubbing at his face. He’s finally changed out of his pyjamas, dressed in a ratty, oversized hoodie and the jeans he’d worn traveling yesterday.

"I’m going to CVS," Chanyeol says.

Kyungsoo looks up and tips his head quizzically. 

"What, right now?"

"We’re all out of Dayquil," Chanyeol says, apologetic. "I need something if I’m going to get through this party."

"Pick up some more baby wipes while you’re there?" Kyungsoo asks. "And—maybe some snacks? I don’t know if we have enough."

"We definitely have enough," Chanyeol says, kissing the crown of Kyungsoo’s head, and then Minsu's. "Mom’s bringing food over, too. We won’t have anywhere to put the leftovers."

"Sure we will. Baekhyun’s backseat. He never says no to free food."

Chanyeol laughs. "Okay. I’ll be back in half an hour."

"You’d better," Kyungsoo says, hoisting Minsu back into his arms to watch Chanyeol's back retreating, smaller and smaller. "You need to change before everyone gets here. If you can’t wear that, your mom will kill me."

—

The afternoon rolls around and their apartment fills to the rafters with friends and family alike, all winding through the cramped space to say hello to Kyungsoo and Chanyeol. Minsu holds court in the kitchen, fastened securely in a high chair and beaming at the endless stream of people coming past to kiss his face or coo over his tiny hanbok. He keeps plucking at the sash with clumsy baby fingers, trying to engineer his way out of it as quickly as possible, but Yura's watching him like a hawk and keeps shoving toys in his hands to distract him from the stiff piece of clothing. He squirms impatiently in Kyungsoo's lap for his doljabi and with absolutely no prompting from either of his fathers, snatches up the plastic microphone to cram into his open mouth, much to the dismay of his grandfathers, who had both been hoping that the stethoscope would catch his eye instead.

Chanyeol seems marginally better, if somewhat subdued, after he finally eats some lunch and drinks a cup of coffee. There are sleepy bags underneath his eyes and he keeps rubbing at his forehead. Halfway through the party he vanishes and Kyungsoo can’t find him anywhere—he’s not in the kitchen with his mother, not sitting on the couch between Baekhyun and Yura, or any of their other friends. It’s conspicuous, a Chanyeol-shaped and -sized void in the middle of the partygoers, no familiar booming laugh, no pair of wide shoulders towering above the huddle of their shorter friends.

"Is it time to give Minsu his cake?" Jongdae asks. He's been ready for it all night, phone camera out and readied for the inevitable moment that Minsu ends up covered in it.

"Hold on," Kyungsoo says. "Let me go find Chanyeol."

Jongdae seems taken aback, suddenly noticing the distinct lack of Chanyeol in the apartment. "Oh. Yeah. Where'd he go?"

"He's been fighting off the flu," Kyungsoo says. "Probably thought he could sneak away and take a nap."

"Tell him to hurry," Jongdae says. 

He finds Chanyeol in their bedroom, sitting tiredly on the edge of the bed. He's got a plastic shopping bag balled up in his hands. He looks up when he sees Kyungsoo and smiles, kind of sleepy and soft.

"Hey. You okay?" Kyungsoo asks, coming to hold Chanyeol's jaw in his hands, tilting his chin up so he can look him in the eyes. "You disappeared."

"Needed a break," Chanyeol mumbles, nuzzling his face into Kyungsoo's stomach. "Too many people out there."

"You're the social butterfly in this relationship, not me. Come on, time for cake. You can go back to bed afterwards. I won’t even make you help me clean up the mess." He brushes the back of his hand across Chanyeol's forehead to check for a temperature, but his skin is cool to the touch.

Chanyeol turns his face a little, just enough to be able to look at a timer counting down on his phone. "Hold on. One more minute."

"For what?"

Chanyeol reaches behind him and Kyungsoo sees it, finally: the pregnancy test box, opened and empty. His stomach swoops dangerously.

"Oh, jesus. Is that why you really went to CVS?"

"No, I really did get Dayquil. I just saw it and thought… you know, better to be really sure."

"Still. You thought right now was the best time? In the middle of Minsu’s first birthday party?"

"I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Just wanted to get it over with."

Kyungsoo nods. He's familiar with that line of thinking. He'd taken his own test right before a show because he couldn't wait until they'd gotten back to the motel that night. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to—?"

"You did it by yourself. When you thought—I don't know. I guess I didn't really think it was serious enough to do it together, but now…"

"Yeah." Kyungsoo bites his lip and looks out the window, trying not to telegraph his panic to Chanyeol. A heavy silence settles between them, Chanyeol still leaning his face into Kyungsoo's hip. Kyungsoo runs a hand through Chanyeol's hair slowly, unable to come up with the right thing to say. Chanyeol's always better at talking them through the tough situations. So if he's not saying anything, then… 

The timer chirps. 

"Moment of truth," Chanyeol says. And then, "Fuck, I'm too nervous. It's going to be negative. Why am I so nervous?" He blinks up at Kyungsoo. His hair's in his eyes a little bit, a little wavy and long enough that he scrapes it back into a short spray of a ponytail when he's working, but right now it's soft against his face and makes him look unreasonably handsome. Even more so than usual, somehow. "Can you go look?"

Kyungsoo steps away. His feet feel like lead. The pregnancy test's sitting on the edge of the sink in their en suite bathroom, waiting for him to pick it up and see the two blue lines winking back at him, unrelenting and _there_. He brings it back with him to sit down heavily on the bed next to Chanyeol, exhaling as he goes.

"Well," he says lamely. "This is awkward. Is this deja vu or plagiarism? Or both?" he asks, trying for the cheap joke to break the tension. It doesn't work.

"Fuck," Chanyeol says, pressing the heels of his hands against his eye sockets. "I know I said it wasn't possible, but I guess I'm an idiot."

"I knew that already." Kyungsoo pauses. "To be fair, in this situation, I think we're both idiots."

"Yeah. We are." Chanyeol sets the test aside and stands up, rubbing his palms on the thighs of his jeans nervously. "Okay. We should talk about this, but later, and maybe not when all of our friends and family are outside the door and can barge in here at any moment."

And as if he knew he was indirectly the topic of conversation, Baekhyun pushes the bedroom door open and peers in at them, grinning. "Hey guys, three feet on the floor."

Jongdae's face appears just over Baekhyun's shoulder. "Yura says she's going to take Minsu home with her if you don't come out here right now and give him his cake."

They disappear and it's just the two of them again, staring at each other. Chanyeol looks tired and unsure, so Kyungsoo crowds in and grabs him by the collar to kiss him. Chanyeol's pouting again when they separate.

"This is okay?" he says, hand settling on Kyungsoo’s hip.

"You're not contagious. Of course it's okay."

Chanyeol almost laughs at that, which is encouraging, even if it's not an answer to the question he's _really_ asking. 

Yura's waiting for them in the hall and watches suspiciously as they trail out of the bedroom, Chanyeol still clasping Kyungsoo's hand like he needs the support to stay upright. "What were you guys up to in there?"

"Mind your own business," Chanyeol says, and although he's teasing her, there's a little edge to his voice. He's still in shock and struggling to act natural. 

"You look terrible, baby bro," she says, feeling his forehead the same way Kyungsoo had done minutes earlier. "You sure you should be here?"

"I'm fine. I can't leave him to do everything on his own," Chanyeol says. "Minsu's going to start to forget my face." 

Jongdae appears at his elbow with a fresh bottle of beer and gestures for Chanyeol to take it. Chanyeol stares at it for a second and the panic starts edging back into his eyes.

Kyungsoo intervenes. "No way. Not with all the cough medicine he's taken today," he lies, snatching the beer and taking a swig of it himself. Chanyeol pretends to look put out but gratefully pats Kyungsoo's ass on his way back into the kitchen where Baekhyun's summoning him.

"You're no fun," Jongdae says, leaning in to rest his chin on Kyungsoo's shoulder. "Kyungsoo, seriously. You're such a dad now."

"Was I ever fun?" Kyungsoo counters. "You guys always gave me shit for not joining in, but who was the one who had to get the van out of impound or convince the cops not to take Baekhyun and Chanyeol to the drunk tank overnight?"

"That's true," Jongdae says. He sighs and smiles at Kyungsoo. "You always were the only responsible adult out of all of us. I guess babysitting us was good training for a real baby, huh? Although, I have to say, I miss hanging out with you guys and getting into trouble."

Kyungsoo shrugs and takes another long sip of beer, grateful to have something to occupy his hands, which are definitely shaking a little bit. "Whose fault is that? You and Baekhyun moved to New York without us."

"I know, I know," Jongdae says, and shoots a sidelong glance at Kyungsoo. "Maybe this fall we should start talking about working on another album? If you're up for it, of course. I know Chanyeol's been working pretty steadily and you're at the college now, but we should find some time and get back to it. We can keep the shows local. Bring the little dude, it’ll be great."

This fall. Kyungsoo does a quick calculation. This kid—if they keep it—will be making an appearance sometime after Thanksgiving. And after that, they'll be trapped back in the shitty newborn phase where they're both delirious and sleep-deprived. They'll be juggling work and Minsu and a new baby, and Kyungsoo can't possibly fathom how a new album would fit into all of that as well, even if it feels like he's being stabbed in the chest every time he thinks about quitting music entirely and never performing again. 

"Kyungsoo?"

"Hm?" He jerks back to the conversation and realizes belatedly he'd been staring off into space with a vacant expression. "Yeah?"

"It's okay if you're not interested," Jongdae says, looking puzzled. "I know you guys have a lot on your plate now."

"No, it's not that. Let me talk to Chanyeol about it," Kyungsoo says, and squeezes Jongdae’s elbow for reassurance. "Sorry. Just thinking about work."

"You okay? Everything okay with you and Chanyeol? You know if you need to talk—"

"We're good, Jongdae," Kyungsoo assures him. "I promise. It's nothing like that. Just me being no fun anymore, you know."

Jongdae's still squinting at him with skepticism written all over his face, but then Chanyeol's yelling for Kyungsoo to come and help with the cake and the conversation's mercifully over, replaced with the delighted laughter of their family and closest friends watching Minsu dive face-first into a chocolate frosted chocolate cake with a green Loch Ness monster design piped across the top. For the moment, at least, it's easy for Kyungsoo not to think about the fact that this all might be changing for them _again_.

— 

It’s not an _argument_ , per se, but it’s definitely not the most comfortable conversation Kyungsoo has ever had with Chanyeol. They’re lying in bed that night, not touching, and they keep circling back to the question of fault and skirting around the real question: _now that this is a reality, what’s next?_ It’s not getting them anywhere except frustrated. It’s past midnight. Minsu's been down for hours. Chanyeol looks _exhausted_ and grey and miserable and he keeps scrubbing his hand over his face like he’s trying to discourage himself from crying.

Chanyeol wasn’t like this before, back when Kyungsoo was the one making the confession. Kyungsoo remembers the heavy dread he felt, knowing his entire life was about to change forever, and he recognizes the same signs in Chanyeol, even though their circumstances couldn’t be more different now. They’ve done this once already. They’re at a different, more solid place in their relationship. There are wedding rings and everything. A home they share. A joint bank account. Support from both of their families.

But he gets it. And he realizes, perhaps belatedly, that the underlying tension in Chanyeol’s attitude probably relates back to Kyungsoo’s complete disinterest in the first pregnancy discovery and his initial reluctance to accept the news as a good thing. He'd even insisted on hiding it from everyone for as long as possible. Chanyeol’s probably afraid of what he believes Kyungsoo isn’t saying. He’s always been worried about disappointing him.

"I’m sorry," Chanyeol’s saying, "it actually did cross my mind a couple times when I was in LA, but I should have told you instead of…"

"Hey." Kyungsoo rolls over onto his stomach and puts a hand on Chanyeol’s chest to soothe him. Chanyeol falters mid-sentence and looks over at Kyungsoo, his brow furrowed.

"I’m sorry," Chanyeol blurts again, like he hasn’t apologized a hundred times already. "I know you didn’t want this—"

"That’s not true," Kyungsoo cuts in. "We’ve talked about it before. We both thought it would be a good idea for Minsu to have a sibling."

"Yeah, but not so soon." Chanyeol sighs through his nose and turns his head a little. "What are you thinking right now? Be honest."

Kyungsoo always chooses his words carefully. He doesn’t want to say anything that would cause Chanyeol to take it the wrong way and blame himself. "I figured we'd have another kid eventually, but I thought it would be me again," he admits finally, and it feels weird to say it out loud. "Didn’t you?"

"I would have been happy if Minsu was it. He was already more than I could have hoped for." Chanyeol's eyes go back to the ceiling. "I don’t know," he continues. "I always thought it wasn’t fair to assume that you'd do it again. You were _so_ sick, for _so_ long. It hurt to watch you, knowing it was all my fault you were that way."

"So now it’s my turn to feel bad?" Kyungsoo teases, and immediately regrets it when Chanyeol’s face scrunches with sudden tears. "Come on, don’t cry," he says, curling into Chanyeol’s side, slotting into the space under his arm where he always feels the safest. "I'm sorry. I just—what is this going to mean for your job? I worry about all of the things you have lined up. We rely on that, and you really enjoy it. I don't want to take that away from you."

"I don't know." Chanyeol sniffs, sounding even more dismayed, his volume rising a notch. "And that’s another thing. We were supposed to get back to the band, and if I go through with this, I’m ruining that for everyone. Jongdae was talking about it today and I just—I’m sorry. And I can't even tell what you're thinking. I don't know what you want me to say, or if you're happy, or—"

"Why wouldn't I be happy?"

"Because this wasn't the plan. You were so freaked out last night when you thought it might be true—I saw the look on your face. You didn't want me to be pregnant."

Instead of saying anything, Kyungsoo reaches over Chanyeol to the box of tissues on the night stand and grabs a few to dab at the tears on Chanyeol’s face. Chanyeol accepts them gratefully and blows his nose.

"I didn't want you to be forced into something you weren't ready for," Kyungsoo says, propping himself up on one elbow to look down at Chanyeol. "Feeling like I want another kid is not the same thing as expecting it to be your turn to do it. One of those is true, the other is not. That's all." 

Chanyeol stares back at him, his eyes bleary. "But…" he trails off.

Kyungsoo strokes Chanyeol's face with his fingertips, tracing the curve of his cheek down to his jaw, pushing his wild, unruly hair out of his eyes. "Look. If you feel like this isn't the right time, then that's okay, too. That's a choice we can make. We know what we're getting into now. It doesn't mean we can't have another one later. Maybe in a few years, wait until Minsu's out of diapers. We can plan for it instead."

"And what if I do want to do it now?" Chanyeol takes a deep, shuddering breath. "Is that okay? What's our option B?"

"Then we do what we did last time. We’ll have another adventure. We've done this before. We sort of know what we're doing now, don't we?" Kyungsoo smiles at him, overwhelmed with sudden excitement, even if things are far from settled yet. This is scary but familiar all the same. It's his turn to be the supportive partner. 

He's not as good at the intuitive sweetness as Chanyeol is, but he tries his best to anticipate what Chanyeol needs, which usually comes down to touch. He slips his fingers in the spaces between Chanyeol's to squeeze his hand and leans in to kiss his chin.

— 

Most nights—at least, the nights when Chanyeol's home and not away on a gig—he's on Minsu duty. If he's in town, Chanyeol has never expected Kyungsoo to lift a finger after dark. That was one of the things he promised back before Minsu was even born, and he has stuck to it faithfully. Kyungsoo appreciates the chance to get a full night’s sleep before he goes into work. He’s been employed part time in the admissions office at Berklee for the past year and they’re a week away from the tuition deposit and acceptance deadline, so between that and the classes he's enrolled in, it’s been a little more hectic than usual lately as the semester draws to a close.

Kyungsoo peels himself out of bed on Monday when his alarm goes off at 6AM and bypasses the bathroom to check on Minsu next door. Minsu’s already sitting up and babbling to himself, hands on the bars of his crib like a tiny prisoner peering out into the dim, half-light of pre-dawn. 

"Ba!" he says when he sees Kyungsoo and raises his arms to be lifted out. Kyungsoo’s heart melts at the sloppy, dimpled grin (with eight teeth!), the wild hair that sticks out at all angles like static electricity. He still looks like a carbon copy of Chanyeol, from the way his eyes crinkle into uneven crescents when he smiles right down to the cute way his ears stick out.

After a quick diaper change, Kyungsoo brings him back into their bedroom and lets him crawl up next to Chanyeol to cuddle while he takes a shower. When he emerges ten minutes later, Chanyeol’s got one eye cracked open but seems resistant to waking up further. Chanyeol usually goes back to sleep for another hour or so after Kyungsoo leaves before he'll get up and make breakfast. It used to be a struggle trying to find a way to reconcile a wide awake baby with fluctuating lesson schedules and one traveling parent until they realized Minsu would happily sleep for another hour in the morning if he got to snuggle with someone, and it usually means they can push off his afternoon nap until after the lunch hour.

"When do you leave again?" Kyungsoo asks, making eye contact with Chanyeol through the reflection in the mirror as he fiddles with his necktie. Chanyeol sags back into the pillows some more and sighs.

"Thursday morning. Just to New York. I’ll be back Saturday." Chanyeol rolls over a little. Minsu’s already settling in, curling up into the crook of Chanyeol’s arm where Kyungsoo had been sleeping before. It’s funny watching them together, a perfect copy and paste, as if Kyungsoo hadn’t been involved at all in Minsu’s creation. If he hadn't lived through the months of nausea and back pain himself, he'd be tempted to believe that Minsu was the product of mitosis.

"You going to be okay?"

A long pause. Chanyeol’s dozing off. "Yeah," he says finally. Kyungsoo chuckles and finishes buttoning his shirt cuffs.

"You’re staying at Baekhyun’s?"

"Mmm." 

"Cool."

"Coo, coo, coo," Minsu echoes, popping his thumb in his mouth. Kyungsoo grins.

"I think I’m going to take Minsu to the Common today," Chanyeol mumbles. "Maybe feed the ducks. Want to meet us? Chinatown for lunch after, maybe?"

"Yeah," Kyungsoo says, leaning over to kiss them both goodbye. "Definitely. Text me when you're heading out."

"Miss you already," Chanyeol calls after him, already sounding half-asleep and therefore not sincere at all.

—

Kyungsoo's running late when he finally meets them over at the Common. Minsu's already finished feeding the ducks and Chanyeol pulls up the pictures on his phone, pausing to describe in great detail the events leading up to a bossy mother duck snatching a whole slice of bread out of Minsu's hand before Chanyeol could help tear it into little pieces for him.

"Minsu loved it," Chanyeol says. "I was afraid she was going to take his fingers off. He tried to get her to come back with another piece but she wasn't having it. I think he wants a pet duck now."

"Jesus christ, Chanyeol," Kyungsoo says, lifting Minsu up onto his hip. He checks his little hands, counts the perfect ten fingers he's been counting every day for a year and two days now, and then squints up at Chanyeol, who's still sort of grinning.

"He was fine, I'm exaggerating. Come on, you think I wouldn't be careful with him?" He catches at Minsu’s little hand and gnashes his teeth playfully, pretending to devour Minsu arm-first until he dissolves into shrieky baby giggles.

"I think I need to get a leash for both of you if I'm going to keep what's left of my sanity."

"Well, maybe the new kid will take your side and it’ll finally be even, although I doubt it," Chanyeol teases. 

Kyungsoo freezes a moment. It's the first time Chanyeol's mentioned the baby outright since their talk on Saturday night. They'd discussed the imminent need to make an appointment with Kyungsoo's doctor here in Boston, and he'd made a remark in passing last night about the apartment being too small for four people, but that's it. It's disorienting, to say the least. Chanyeol's usually the chatty one in their relationship. He fills the silences with words and laughter and music and never once prods Kyungsoo to keep up, happy to be responsible for both sides of a conversation, sometimes. He can't shut the fuck up about anything and everything that's on his mind, often to Kyungsoo’s great annoyance, but this—he's been keeping it inside himself, sitting in his studio for most of Sunday, rubbing his knuckles against his mouth in quiet contemplation.

"Aren't _we_ supposed to be the team against the kids?" Kyungsoo asks, deliberately calm, dashing a quick kiss on Minsu's brow to cover his surprised expression. "Wasn't that why I married you? Or am I going to be raising all three of you? Because if that's the case, I quit. We can get a quickie divorce on the way home."

Chanyeol beams and holds his hands out for Minsu to strap him back in the backpack carrier. "I think you answered your own question, Daddy."

"Help, this strange man is abducting my baby," Kyungsoo says flatly, tugging at the snap under Minsu’s arms to make sure it’s secure.

"Hep!" Minsu parrots, looking especially pleased with his new word when Chanyeol starts howling with laughter.

—

They go to Chanyeol's favorite dumpling house, a tiny hole-in-the-wall place with one waiter, the same old guy who's been working there since they were in high school. He recognizes them immediately and takes them to their usual table in the corner near the windows. It gives them a view of the intersection and the sidewalk outside, great for people-watching and general entertainment for Minsu, who likes to watch for cars and dogs.

Chanyeol gets progressively quieter as their food arrives, and Kyungsoo doesn't push him to say anything. It's easy to fill the gaps in conversation with remarks to Minsu, offering him little bites of the food off his plate and pointing at the cars outside to teach him colors.

Abruptly, Chanyeol pushes his chair back and pinches the bridge of his nose. Kyungsoo looks up, spoon poised.

"Hm?"

Chanyeol shakes his head and takes a deep breath. Another. Then, he gets to his feet quickly enough to slosh the water glasses and makes a dash to the bathroom, nearly bowling over the waiter in his haste. He doesn't return for nearly ten minutes, and he looks very pale and shaky when he does.

"Are you okay?" Kyungsoo asks, reaching out to stroke Chanyeol's arm. He's already paid the bill and gotten everything boxed up and ready to go. The waiter had come over, concerned that something had gone terribly wrong. Kyungsoo had to apologize and explain: _the food's great, he's just pregnant,_ which made him woozy to say out loud. They haven't told anyone yet, not their parents or their friends, and here he is, explaining it to a sixty-year-old stranger in an apron. Kyungsoo tips the full cost of their lunch to put his mind at ease.

"Yeah," Chanyeol says, purposely averting his eyes from another customer's food on a nearby table. "That was weird. Food poisoning?"

"If that's what you want to call it, sure," Kyungsoo says, giving him a knowing look. "Come on, let's get you home."

"No, you've got to get back to the office," Chanyeol protests feebly.

"It's fine. I'll work remotely for the rest of the day." He gathers up Minsu's things and helps him back into the carrier and then puts it on his own back.

"I'm sorry," Chanyeol says. "It sounded so good, and then I don't know what happened. Suddenly—"

"It was the worst thing you'd ever tasted in your life, and you couldn't understand why anyone ate food ever?" Kyungsoo finishes for him. "Yeah. I remember. Wasn't that long ago."

"God, I'm sorry," Chanyeol says again. His palm is cold and clammy when Kyungsoo takes his hand.

They pause at the station, and Kyungsoo glances across the platform to where the B line train is boarding. "We could go see your parents on the way home," Kyungsoo suggests lightly, and Chanyeol picks up what he's getting at immediately.

"Now?"

"If you're still not feeling well, maybe not _right_ now, but—"

"Yeah, no," he cuts in. "Let's—I don't want to tell them like this and make it seem like we had an accident—"

"Although we did. Again."

"Yeah. Again." Chanyeol's mouth twists into a wry smile. "Look. Mother's Day is coming up, let's… get the grandparents some flowers and show up at lunch, tell everybody then, all at once. You know, do it intentionally."

"Yeah, okay," Kyungsoo agrees. Chanyeol's clearly nervous about some imaginary fallout, some disappointment he somehow feels is warranted. "You know your mom's not going to be upset, right? She loves Minsu. She loves being a grandmother. And we're adults—we're even _married_ now. Baekhyun can't even call it our bastard child this time."

That forces a startled laugh out of Chanyeol and the worried lines on his forehead soften. He's still very, very pale. "Yeah. I know. I just—it feels weird."

"Yeah, I know," Kyungsoo says softly, running his thumb over Chanyeol's knuckles. "Do you want to call Yura and talk to her about it?"

Chanyeol looks down at Kyungsoo. "You haven't told her yet?"

"No. I haven't told anyone. Until you say so, it's just you and me." He pushes his glasses back up the bridge of his nose with a cocked wrist and smiles up at Chanyeol. "When I told her about Minsu, she was really supportive of me… of us, I guess. It might make you feel better about telling your parents if Yura already knows."

Chanyeol hesitates and then squeezes Kyungsoo's hand. "Yeah, maybe. Not yet. I want it to just be us for a little while longer."

"Okay," Kyungsoo says gently, squeezing back. 

—

Minsu takes his first steps at the end of April, two weeks after his birthday party. Kyungsoo's in the middle of a theory class when the text message comes in from Chanyeol, who's been teaching lessons from home since he got back from LA. He has to wait to check his messages until the bell rings and he's walking out across the street to grab a coffee before his afternoon music history class. _We're in trouble now :)_ it reads. A video follows that stops Kyungsoo in his tracks in the middle of the crosswalk, bringing the traffic in the left turn lane to an abrupt and noisy halt, but he doesn't care. It's Minsu pulling himself upright using the coffee table the way he has been for weeks now, and, after some enthusiastic coaxing from Chanyeol, pushing himself away to take three wobbly steps. He overbalances trying for the fourth and lands on his butt, and his bright, delighted laughter rings out for a moment before the video cuts. Kyungsoo replays it, walking slowly now, marveling at the concentration on Minsu's face as he figures out how to coordinate his muscles towards the effort of that first step, then the second.

Kyungsoo calls Chanyeol immediately, abandoning his mission for coffee.

"You're kidding!" he says before Chanyeol even says hello.

"Did you watch it?" Chanyeol asks. "Isn't he amazing?"

"I did," Kyungsoo says. "Amazing. I can't believe he's walking!"

"He's _walking_ ," Chanyeol repeats proudly. "I can't believe I was finally here to see him hit a milestone. I figured he wouldn't even try until I left for LA again."

Kyungsoo laughs. There's precedent for Chanyeol's assumption. Having to travel so much for work meant that Chanyeol _had_ missed a lot: the first smile, rolling over, crawling, sitting up, the first tooth. It was unavoidable, and Kyungsoo _never_ tried to rub it in, but Chanyeol's excitement every time he got a similar message from Kyungsoo was always colored with envy and regret. Kyungsoo gets it; he's feeling a little bit that way right now.

 _I think he's doing it on purpose,_ Chanyeol complained once. 

_Growing up, you mean?_ Kyungsoo asked, baiting him into laughing as a way to sidestep the issue.

"I'll be home by four," Kyungsoo tells him now. "Don't let him run any marathons until I get there. And film everything."

"Copy that. All clear on hurdles, though?"

"Yeah, hurdles are fine," Kyungsoo says wistfully, looking over his shoulder at the outline of the train station down the block. It would be so easy to blow everything off and take the next green line home to be there. But—finals are coming up, and he needs to pass this class if he's ever going to finally finish this degree he's been working on for a decade. He turns away to put it out of his mind. "Hey. Gotta run. I love you. Don't tire him out."

Chanyeol's laughing when he hangs up. A moment later Kyungsoo's phone vibrates again, and this time it's an overhead picture of Minsu in Chanyeol's lap, pointed down at the keys of Chanyeol's old Yamaha electric keyboard. Minsu's hands look so tiny pressing down the keys in what must have been a dissonant smash of sound. _Study hard Daddy ❤_ , it says.

He sets it as his new phone wallpaper immediately.

—

They celebrate Mother's Day as a combined family. It's been a tradition for years, long before Chanyeol and Kyungsoo had put a name to what they were doing with each other. Back then it was just two close families crammed into the large booth at the back of Chanyeol's family's restaurant for lunch, all four kids and two sets of parents. Seungsoo's out in San Francisco now with his wife and three daughters, so he Skypes in to say hello, but the ritual’s mostly the same as it ever was, anyway.

Chanyeol's been struggling with nausea the past few weeks, but he seems in moderately good spirits when they disembark the T in Brighton and turn up the street where Chanyeol's family lives. Kyungsoo's been here so many times in his life he could probably navigate here in his sleep. The Park family restaurant has been in business for over thirty years, and they've been living above it for just as long. He remembers coming here after school for snacks before Mrs. Park shooed them upstairs to finish their homework, which they barely bothered to do when there was music to make or video games to play. It still feels like coming home now when they come through the swinging screen door at the back of the restaurant and into the kitchen.

Mr. Park's over at the stove when they arrive. "Go help your mother set the table," he says immediately, by way of greeting, and then waves at Minsu.

The dining room is small and cramped, with wooden booths on both sides and in the center of the restaurant. There are a few large booths in the back to accommodate parties larger than four, which is where they always gather when they're together. When it's packed with the lunch or dinner rush, it's almost impossible to move around without bumping into someone, and forget about having a conversation with the din of patrons, but for right now it's quiet, save for the classical music piping through the room from the ancient, greasy boombox at the host station up front. The walls are lined with family photographs from over the years, including, embarrassingly, every single one of Chanyeol and Yura's school portraits. Back here in the booth, there are even pictures of Minsu and Kyungsoo, which makes him feel warm all over every time he sees them. It feels like a rite of passage, a badge of honor to finally be considered part of the family enough to make the wall.

Chanyeol pushes a bouquet of roses into Mrs. Park's hands and stoops to kiss her cheek. She hugs him, and then Kyungsoo, and then reaches out for Minsu. Kyungsoo unsnaps him from the carrier and passes him over so Mrs. Park can gush over him. Chanyeol busies himself with finishing the table settings and checking the front door to make sure it's locked and the sign's in place: _CLOSED FOR PRIVATE FAMILY EVENT. WE WILL OPEN TONIGHT AT 5PM. SEE YOU FOR DINNER! HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY- PARK FAMILY._

Kyungsoo's parents arrive just as the food's ready, and the exchange happens again: the roses, the cheek kisses, the passing of the grandchild. Minsu loves the attention. He spends a lot of his afternoons with his grandmothers, especially when Chanyeol's out of town and Kyungsoo has to go to work. They speak to him exclusively in Korean. _"He's going to speak it better than you do,"_ Kyungsoo's mother insists, still slightly miffed at how Americanized he's become over the years. _"It's important for him to have both."_

Chanyeol even made bets on it, although he's notoriously bad at winning them. Two months ago, he laid down a crisp $50 and insisted Minsu's first full, clear word would be a Korean one, only for Minsu to look him dead in the eye a week later during a diaper change and say, "Daddy." He’s been picking up words rapidly ever since. It’s just their luck that Chanyeol’s progeny would turn out to be an early talker.

Yura arrives, finally, out of breath and flustered. She's been staying with her boyfriend this weekend, some guy who works with her at the Globe and lives all the way out in Cambridge. She kisses her mother's cheek, then Kyungsoo's mother, and does a round of hellos for the table. Formalities taken care of, she slides into the booth next to Kyungsoo on his other side, and immediately puts her hands out for Minsu. Kyungsoo's dad passes him over.

"Careful," Chanyeol murmurs to her, only loud enough for Kyungsoo to overhear. "Your baby rabies is going to scare this new guy away."

"Bite me," she says, grinning. Minsu immediately goes for her necklace, a huge, chunky statement piece with a whole piece of asymmetrical quartz crystal dangling from a delicate gold chain. She doesn't seem to mind that he's always testing everything around her neck to see if it's edible, but she does gently tug this one away from him and tucks it down the neck of her dress before he hurts himself on a sharp edge.

"So, boys," Kyungsoo's mother starts. "Is this the year you let us have a real wedding for you? Your grandmother's asking when to book a flight over to come and see you."

"I—maybe?" Kyungsoo says, completely disinterested in the _big party_ part of being married that their parents keep insisting on. They've got the marriage license, which is as real as it needs to be, but he also knows that between his mother and Chanyeol's, they'll be forcing them into hanbok and into a ballroom full of 300 of their closest friends and relatives at some point. They're still put out that they weren't given the opportunity last year.

"Maybe? What does that mean, exactly?" Chanyeol's mother asks, reaching over Yura to wipe some dribble off Minsu's face.

"Well. Uh. It's just hard, with Chanyeol traveling for work all the time," Kyungsoo says lamely, casting a sidelong glance at Chanyeol, who hasn't said a word. He keeps fidgeting with his wedding ring and seems completely unable to join in on the conversation. Kyungsoo's on his own for the moment and it's strange having to be the brave one. He reaches into the diaper bag at his feet and pulls out matching greeting cards in pale blue envelopes, nudging them towards the opposite end of the table. "Anyway. Happy Mother's Day, from us."

Chanyeol stiffens beside him, his grip painful on Kyungsoo's thigh as the grandmothers both open their envelopes. This is the moment they've been anticipating since they found out last month. An agonizing second goes by, and then another. Chanyeol's mother breaks first, wailing out loud—happily, of course, but Kyungsoo still startles at the abrupt noise.

"Oh, that's _wonderful,_ " she says, holding up the grainy, black-and-white ultrasound to show the rest of the table. "Another baby!"

"Don't cry," Kyungsoo warns, feeling a little misty himself at the reaction. "You'll just make Chanyeol cry."

"Too late," Chanyeol says, his voice wobbly and strained with tears. Kyungsoo's mother gets to her feet and kisses both of them, her hand dropping to Kyungsoo's middle.

"Thank you for giving me such beautiful grandchildren," she says into his hair, so sweetly overjoyed that Kyungsoo feels glad that they're doing this after all. This is the kind of reaction Chanyeol needed, he thinks, to feel reassured.

"Oh, no, Mom. It's not me this time," Kyungsoo clarifies, jerking his thumb in Chanyeol's direction. "It's his turn."

"I _knew_ it!" Yura crows, looking smug. She kisses Chanyeol on the cheek and then punches Kyungsoo in the bicep. "You sly dog! I didn't know you had it in you. You knew! The night you came over without him, you lied right to my face!" She clutches her chest dramatically. "Kyungsoo, I thought we had something special."

"He didn't know. But you totally freaked him out," Chanyeol says, laughing. Being surrounded by people who adore the shit out of him has vanquished the underlying tension he's been living with since they found out. He wipes at the tears on his cheek with his sleeve until Kyungsoo supplies him with a napkin. "He came home panicking about it. Woke me up to ask me if I was pregnant. I didn't take a test until later."

"You’re going to be a big brother," Yura coos at Minsu, tickling him under his chin to get him to giggle again. "This is so exciting! When?"

"Early December," Chanyeol says.

"A Christmas baby!"

The grandparents are distracted for the moment, chatting animatedly about the new grandchild on the way. Chanyeol takes the opportunity to lean into Kyungsoo and kiss the corner of his mouth. Kyungsoo smiles, feeling a flush rise to the high points of his cheeks.

"What was that for?" he mumbles, eyes cast low.

"I don't know. Just wanted to. You looked cute." Then, quieter, whispering into the rim of his glass so Yura doesn't hear: "If I wasn't already pregnant, I'd let you knock me up."

Kyungsoo slaps Chanyeol's thigh under the table loudly enough to draw everyone's attention. "Fruit fly," he says blithely when five pairs of eyes swivel their direction. Chanyeol chokes on his water.

—

"See? That wasn't so bad," Kyungsoo says later when they're back at home on the couch. Minsu's cuddling in Kyungsoo's lap, his thumb in his mouth, leaning back heavily into the cradle of Kyungsoo’s arms. He's already been changed into his pajamas and it's nearly time to put him down to sleep but he's been especially resistant to the idea of going to bed alone tonight. Every time Kyungsoo goes to stand up he fusses and wails and wakes himself back up again, which puts them back at square one, so they've been sitting here watching Netflix on the lowest volume setting, waiting for him to nod off completely.

Chanyeol looks up from stroking Minsu's hair. "Yeah," he says, smiling a little. "I think we should keep having kids every year to put off the wedding reception indefinitely. I saw that crazed look in my mom’s eyes. She wants to go big."

"Not a bad idea," Kyungsoo deadpans. "Although I think they'll catch on eventually. You can’t hide from the grandmothers forever."

"Do you think Jongdae and Baekhyun are going to be mad?"

"Mad? No way." Kyungsoo shakes his head. Jongdae had been immediately supportive of Kyungsoo when he found out, and they both love being an uncle to Minsu so much. Half the toys scattered around the living room are from one or both of them. "Baekhyun's _definitely_ going to make jokes, though, because he never misses an opportunity to make fun of us."

"He makes fun of _you_."

"I hate to be the one to break it to you, but he makes fun of you, too." Kyungsoo grins, looking down at the sleepy baby in his arms.

Kyungsoo dozes off at some point halfway through an episode of The Good Place and only wakes up with a start when he feels Minsu's weight lifting off his shoulder. He reaches out to catch him instinctively, panicking, his sleep-scrambled brain _so sure_ that he's about to drop the baby off the arm of the couch and headfirst onto the hardwood floor, but when he opens his eyes it's only Chanyeol. 

"Shh," Chanyeol says, cradling Minsu’s head to his chest. "I'm putting him back in his crib. Get up and go to bed. I'll be right in."

Kyungsoo groans and rolls off the couch, feeling cotton-mouthed and strangely disoriented. He hates falling asleep on the couch and he can't stay there overnight if he wants to be able to move his neck the next day. But any time he falls asleep somewhere he’s not supposed to, it takes him forever to fall back asleep once he's relocated to their bed.

He crawls under the covers and lies there for a while, listening to Chanyeol whisper to Minsu over the baby monitor. He comes in after a moment and turns off the lights on his way into bed. Kyungsoo doesn't immediately gravitate towards Chanyeol under the covers these days, in case the physical proximity and body heat makes him nauseous, but Chanyeol seems to have no such issues tonight and pulls him close.

"He is so cute," Chanyeol says, sighing happily.

"You are such a narcissist. You say that all the time, knowing that he looks exactly like you," Kyungsoo says, rubbing his cheek against the soft cotton fabric of Chanyeol’s shirt.

Chanyeol laughs. "You don't think I'm cute?"

"See? It always comes back to you." Kyungsoo drapes his arm over Chanyeol’s waist. "You’re okay, I guess. Go to sleep."

"I can't," Chanyeol says. "The heartburn is killing me."

"Oh, I remember that part, too," Kyungsoo says, pushing up onto his elbow. "Sit up a little, it helps."

Chanyeol frowns but obliges, wedging another pillow behind his back to keep himself supported and partially upright. He makes a face down at Kyungsoo and rolls his eyes. "When does the sex maniac stuff start? I liked that part."

Kyungsoo laughs. "It wasn't that good. It felt like an itch I could not scratch, no matter what."

"I scratched it for you plenty of times, if I recall," Chanyeol says.

"And it was never enough," Kyungsoo says. "It was awful. You'll see. Plus, it's not like we have the luxury of fucking all day if that's what you feel like doing. We've both got jobs now. And a kid. You're going to be jerking yourself raw a lot over the next few months."

Chanyeol scoffs. "Now, that’s just rude. You kiss your mother with that mouth, Do Kyungsoo?"

"I'll buy you some good lube," Kyungsoo says, turning over on his other side. "You'll be fine."

It feels weird talking about it without having to go through it again. He almost feels hollow at the thought that this is happening without him. Well, not _without him_ , but his work is done. He never meant to be a parent at all, and now it's happening again. He'd hated it at the time, but now he wonders, guiltily, if he will feel differently about a baby he didn't carry, and then he feels like a piece of shit that the thought even crossed his mind. No, these kids belong to the both of them, regardless of who carries them. But. He’s not used to being the one having to hold Chanyeol’s hand to comfort him. He doesn’t know what to _do_ at any given moment. Chanyeol always just seems to know exactly what Kyungsoo needs, what everyone needs, all the time, without anyone having to ask. It's his greatest talent. 

He rolls over again and catches Chanyeol watching him with that same dopey, sweet look on his face.

"What?"

"You're cute, too," Chanyeol says softly.

Kyungsoo laughs awkwardly. He never knows how to react when Chanyeol says sweet things to him in that quiet, sincere tone of voice. "Shut up."

"I mean it."

"If I suck your dick will you shut up and go to sleep?"

" _While_ you’re sucking my dick? Probably not, but you're welcome to try," Chanyeol says, and kisses Kyungsoo before he can tell him to fuck off.

Kyungsoo takes his time tugging down the elastic waist of Chanyeol's sweatpants, nuzzling at Chanyeol's half-hard cock with an unhurried fondness that provokes a sharp intake of breath from Chanyeol. Where Kyungsoo usually likes to draw things out as long as possible, Chanyeol is impatient. Kyungsoo can do this all night, or at least for the next ten minutes, his lips slack and soft, leaving wet kisses everywhere except the places Chanyeol really wants them.

He kisses the tip and then blows on it and Chanyeol shivers, cock fully hard now and flexing.

Kyungsoo's most comfortable lying flat on his stomach while he does this, bracketed in between Chanyeol's legs, leaning heavily on his thighs, sucking his cock so slowly that he can feel the rolling shudders down Chanyeol's spine. Each lazy spit-wet stroke pulls another low moan from deep inside Chanyeol's chest until he's breathing like he just ran a marathon. Kyungsoo hits some kind of meditative state where he could do this forever, his jaw still relaxed somehow, swallowing to suppress his gag reflex each time he lets Chanyeol uptick his hips and bump against the back of his throat.

"Ah, shit. Ah— _fuck_ , Kyungsoo, _oh._ " Chanyeol's breathing hitches and gets desperate, and for a moment it sounds like he's going to come, but instead he's tapping frantically on Kyungsoo's shoulder to get his attention.

Kyungsoo stops, his mouth sloppy, lips numb. Looking up at Chanyeol like this makes him seem even bigger than he really is. "Hm?" he says, voice rasping and sore, dumb with arousal, his brain moving slowly to catch up with Chanyeol. "What’s wrong?"

"You don't want to finish in me?"

Kyungsoo laughs and rises on his knees, wiping off his mouth with the back of his hand. He's not going to say no. It feels too good not to take him up on the offer, especially when Chanyeol's begging for it. He lines himself up and slides in with one fluid motion, pulling one of Chanyeol's thighs up on his shoulder for leverage. Chanyeol's skin is on fire, sweat sticking their bodies together. He looks so gorgeous, out of his mind horny every time he bottoms for Kyungsoo. His hands go everywhere, restless and desperate, pulling Kyungsoo in for a kiss, then dropping to Kyungsoo's ass to urge him deeper, wanting everything all at once. Chanyeol's deceptively flexible when he's on his back and Kyungsoo wants to fold him in half and fuck him through the mattress. 

"Harder," Chanyeol urges, and then bursts out laughing when a particularly brutal thrust bangs the headboard into the wall. "Fuck _me_ , not the security deposit."

Kyungsoo doesn't take the bait, but he does drop Chanyeol's leg to allow him to lean his weight forward onto Chanyeol's flushed pink chest, his hips moving in shallow, rapid thrusts that leave them both panting and close. Chanyeol's body seems so solid and strong under Kyungsoo's hands, familiar territory mapped out like this so many times. He knows just where to squeeze without looking, thumb pressed tightly against a nipple until Chanyeol squirms and arches into it, panting open-mouthed, searching for a kiss that Kyungsoo keeps denying him.

"God, come on," Chanyeol moans, working a hand in between their bodies to catch hold of his cock. He jerks himself off roughly, hand slippery with precome, fist knocking into Kyungsoo's ribs until he comes abruptly with a relieved sigh. tension bleeding from his body with such immediate force that he goes limp under Kyungsoo, eyes heavy-lidded, waiting for him to follow.

Some minutes later they're lying there, curled around each other, bodies bare. Kyungsoo strokes Chanyeol's damp hair out of his sweaty face, kissing him with an unhurried affection that hadn't been possible earlier. Patience hasn't always come easily between the two of them, but in the afterglow, Kyungsoo's content to kiss Chanyeol for hours—or, at least, until his elbow hurts too much to support his entire weight anymore.

Before that happens, Chanyeol maneuvers Kyungsoo onto his back and lets his chin rest on his chest, staring up at him with those liquid brown eyes. "I want to be around more," he says. "I'm tired of missing you and Minsu all the time."

"Then be around more. You don't have to miss us," Kyungsoo says softly, still raking Chanyeol's hair off his face. "We're not going anywhere. We're right here. You have us as much as you want."

"It’s never enough," Chanyeol murmurs, turning his face into Kyungsoo's palm to kiss it. He's already getting anxious about his trip back to LA later this month. He's been given the all-clear to fly by his doctors, but it's more than that: the loneliness of being on the road has finally made the emotional cost too high to travel for work without his family for weeks on end. "Can you come with me?" he asks again. "Both of you?"

Kyungsoo lies back and does some quick math in his head. "The second week you’re there, I think we can. First week of June."

"Not both weeks?" Chanyeol asks, looking a little mopey. 

"Probably not," Kyungsoo says, thumbing at Chanyeol's plump lower lip. "I've got to work, too. Remember? We've got to do this so he can go to college in seventeen years."

"Who says he's going to college? He doesn’t have to if he doesn’t want to. _We_ didn't go to college."

" _You_ didn't," Kyungsoo says. "I dropped out, but I went back. And besides, aren't parents supposed to want their kids to go to college?"

Chanyeol laughs. "I guess. If you want him to be a total sell-out."

"I hate to break it to you, but I am a complete sell-out," Kyungsoo says. "I'm fine with it. I'm tired. I can't imagine going back out on tour ever again. I'd rather come home at the end of the day and sleep on a good mattress." 

It's mostly true. There are some days where Kyungsoo misses touring so much it _aches_ , lost and lonely, like there's a version of him still living in an alternate timeline, and every once in a while he becomes aware of his other self still out there and living on the road. Instead, he's back where he was at 18, mostly—Minsu was never supposed to be here, but the rest of it, the college classes, the steady work, it's where he always thought he'd be, before the other three showed up at his dorm one night in the middle of the semester and talked him into dropping out. He hadn't even told his parents until he was halfway across the country. There was an old payphone in the club they'd booked, and he spent 50 cents to leave them a voicemail, apologizing for the wasted tuition. He didn't speak to them for six weeks after that call.

Chanyeol gasps in mock outrage. "Do Kyungsoo. What happened? You've become The Man."

"I have. I'm The Man. Like Jongdae was telling me, I'm a boring dad now. And I'm tired," Kyungsoo says, curling a little closer into Chanyeol's warmth. "Sorry, I'm no fun anymore. If I ever was."

"Me, neither." Chanyeol drops another kiss on Kyungsoo’s wrist, nuzzling his face against it afterwards. "We're going to be a boring old married couple together, at least."

"It's before midnight and we're in bed after a rousing seven minutes of sex, which is the most we've fucked in the last three months, and that's including the bathroom at the club incident. I'm half-asleep. We already _are_ a boring old married couple."

"We haven’t hit rock bottom yet," Chanyeol murmurs, similarly drowsy. "I refuse to give in without a fight."

"Okay." Kyungsoo yawns, turning his face into the side of Chanyeol’s neck. "Let’s revisit this conversation in another couple of months and see how you feel about it."

—

Baekhyun and Jongdae come into town the following weekend to belatedly celebrate Baekhyun's birthday. Jongdae's in great spirits: on their drive back to Boston that morning, he got a phone call informing him that he'd landed the role of the Emcee in a black box theatre production of Cabaret, and it's a year-long run, the longest and biggest role he's gotten since he and Baekhyun moved to New York nearly a year ago to pursue theatre full-time. Baekhyun insists on lunch at a brewpub near the Financial District, and squints suspiciously at Chanyeol when he declines to even _look_ at the beer menu.

"Park Chanyeol, since when do you turn down a chance to day-drink?" Baekhyun says, his eyes twinkling. He and Jongdae exchange a conspicuous look. Kyungsoo chuckles. This part’s kind of fun—before, he’d been on the receiving end of Baekhyun’s good-natured harassment, but watching it redirected onto Chanyeol is always immensely satisfying.

"Well, I..." Chanyeol starts, sounding nervous. He doesn't say anything else after that. Jongdae takes a long drink of his ice water, his eyes never leaving Chanyeol's face.

Baekhyun lifts his eyebrows, looking similarly amused. "Go on."

"It turns out that... I'm kind of pregnant."

"You can't be kind of pregnant. It's a binary state. You either are, or you aren’t, which means you are," Jongdae says matter-of-factly. And then he turns to Baekhyun, a smug grin on his face: "I fucking told you, Baekhyun. You owe me twenty dollars. Pay up."

Baekhyun laughs and leans forward to extract his wallet from the back pocket of his jeans. He opens it, and, hesitating slightly, asks, "Wait. Does it count? You thought it was going to be Kyungsoo again. You didn’t specifically name Chanyeol in your side of the bet."

"It counts, don’t think you can weasel your way out of this one. Give me my money."

Kyungsoo squawks indignantly. "You assholes were _betting_ on us?"

"You were being incredibly weird at Minsu's party,"Jongdae says reasonably. "At least I bet on the kid. Baekhyun thought you were breaking up."

"Wow. Thanks for the confidence, I guess," Kyungsoo says, swatting at Baekhyun, who grins beatifically at him.

"How was I supposed to know? You always wait until the last minute to tell us anything," Baekhyun says.

"I mean, first of all, let me wind it back and say congratulations, of course," Jongdae says, stuffing the twenty bill in his wallet. He hugs Chanyeol, and then stands up to reach over the table to hug Kyungsoo, too. "But also, thanks for the cash. I guess this explains why you were so unenthusiastic about working on any new projects right now."

"No, I still want to do it," Chanyeol insists. "I think we should."

"Chanyeol…"

"We can, _I_ can," he says. "We’ve got a lot of time. I'm here most of the summer. I’ve only got a couple of things booked. We should try and work on some new songs."

Jongdae smiles at him. "Chanyeol, I don't—we're not going anywhere. If it doesn't happen this year, it can happen next year. There’s plenty of stuff we’re all working on—"

"I want it to happen this year," Chanyeol says stubbornly. "I'll make it work. I want it to work."

Kyungsoo sits back in the booth and sighs. "I seem to remember being overruled by you guys when I said the same thing."

" _You_ were ready to call it quits and break up the band," Baekhyun reminds him, annoyingly, flicking a few droplets of iced tea from the end of his straw in Kyungsoo's direction. 

— 

When Chanyeol leaves for Los Angeles, the week _drags_ by. Kyungsoo goes to sleep every night with his phone in hand, waiting for a text or a call from Chanyeol that usually comes long past midnight. Every day feels never-ending and strange without him banging around the apartment. Nothing has changed yet with their physical space, but somehow things have felt much cozier over the past month and a half. They have to move—and that’s another vital, urgent conversation they keep putting off—but for now it’s just the three of them, and Chanyeol’s absence on the other side of the bed has never felt more conspicuous.

"I can't wait for you to be here," Chanyeol says the night before Kyungsoo's due to fly out with Minsu. "I miss you guys so much."

And Kyungsoo's excited, too—at least, until he finishes packing and realizes he's going to be juggling a suitcase and a stroller _and_ a baby all by himself at the airport. He ends up calling his father for a ride to Logan under the guise of _not dropping seventy fucking dollars on an Uber ride_ but really he's infinitely more grateful for the extra set of hands to help him drag the suitcase up to the counter.

Security's a breeze at this hour. They're taking an evening flight on purpose to arrive late in Los Angeles, near midnight, to align with Chanyeol's work schedule. Still, the man behind them in line visibly winces at the sight of Minsu in the sling across Kyungsoo's chest, and Kyungsoo gets it: babies on flights can be a nightmare. Minsu's been on an airplane a handful of times already and he's proven to be very easygoing, as long as he's got his pacifier to suck on during takeoffs and landings (they'd learned that lesson the hard way). 

He's in luck tonight, at least. Minsu dozes off before they even board the plane. Kyungsoo has to awkwardly maneuver himself into his seat and buckle up with one hand, but a kind woman helps him fold up the stroller and check it for him at the front of the plane, and the sling gives him enough freedom to push the diaper bag under the seat in front of him.

"So sweet," the woman, his seatmate whispers over the drone of the flight safety instruction video blasting at the front of the plane. "How old?"

"Thirteen months," Kyungsoo says, already feeling the prickle of pins and needles under the dead weight of a slumbering baby. 

"Oh, I loved it when my kids were that age." She puts a hand over her heart and smiles. "He's really adorable. And so quiet!"

"Thank you. Hopefully he stays that way," Kyungsoo says, offering her a small smile of his own. 

Chanyeol's waiting for them at the baggage claim. He's rubbing at his face, struggling with the late hour, and his upper lip is scruffy and unshaven from the past week. He's got his glasses on, too, and his hair tied up in a knot with a hairband to keep the stray locks out of his eyes. He looks _disgusting_. Kyungsoo fucking loves him so much his ribs ache.

"Hey," Chanyeol says quietly around a yawn, giving Kyungsoo a kiss hello. "Should I take him or the bags?"

"Bags," Kyungsoo says, checking on Minsu, who blinks at him sleepily from the sling and turns his face into Kyungsoo's chest to block out the harsh fluorescent light in the airport. "He slept most of the flight."

"That's amazing."

"I have no such hope for our flight home," he says. "We're not that lucky."

They're flying back together, at least, which means he can trade off with Chanyeol instead of flying solo with a baby, which is his absolute least favorite thing to do even under the best of circumstances.

"He's going to wake up on East Coast time," Kyungsoo warns him. "Especially since he slept so well on the flight. We may not have a restful night tonight."

"It's fine. I'll take him. That's the deal, right?"

Kyungsoo smiles and squeezes Chanyeol's hand. "That's not what I meant. You have to work, I’ll get up with him."

"No, no. Nights are mine. I like spending time with him. I feel like every time I see him he's gotten bigger. I have to get to know him all over again."

Kyungsoo's heart lurches painfully. Chanyeol's still kicking himself over his perceived absenteeism.

"Hey," he says softly. "Come on. It’s only been a week, it’s not that bad. Cheer up. We're here."

"Yeah, you are," Chanyeol says. "Finally." He takes a fresh grip of the suitcase and leads Kyungsoo out to the short-term car park. He secures the car seat in the back and gets Minsu strapped in while Kyungsoo climbs into the passenger seat. He's so drowsy. It's nearly two in the morning according to his internal body clock. Years ago, he was able to make the switch back and forth without worrying about it, but now he just feels drained and jetlagged already.

"I may sleep for the next three days," he warns, leaning back in the passenger seat. 

Chanyeol reaches across the center console to hold his hand for a moment. "You can do whatever you want. We're on vacation."

" _I’m_ on vacation. You're still working. Unless we should stay another week?" Kyungsoo asks, throwing the suggestion out there as he plays idly with the clasp on Chanyeol's watch. Chanyeol's eyes light up.

"Yeah. Yeah, let's do that," he says, already making plans to cancel all his lessons back in Boston for the following week. It's not cheap, but it's probably the last chance for a vacation they’re going to have for a while. 

The Airbnb is near the beach, a little white single-story cottage looking out over the sea. Private. Sheltered. Quiet. The kind of place that belongs in a magazine spread. There’s a wide wooden deck built out the back and a set of narrow stairs that lead right out onto the beach. Kyungsoo stands for a moment at the embankment where the grass turns into smooth, pale sand, looking out at the ocean, where the inky, foam-tipped waves lapping up against the sand and retreating with a sigh.

"It's fucking amazing here," Kyungsoo says.

Chanyeol glances over his shoulder from where he's trying to extract Minsu from the backseat without waking him. "It really is. We'd never be able to afford to stay in a place like this back when we were touring."

"You'd never let us stay anywhere this nice with Baekhyun—he's too much of a liability. We’d end up forfeiting the whole deposit and still owe thousands in repairs. God. So many fleabag motels that all looked exactly the same. I don't miss _that_ part of being on the road."

"No, me neither," Chanyeol says. He comes up next to Kyungsoo to share the view, a slumbering Minsu in his arms. "Did you pack sunscreen for him?"

"Of course I did," Kyungsoo says, and stretches his arms as far as they’ll go, pretending the horizon’s only a few millimeters away out of reach, just shy of his fingertips. Out here, with the sea and the sand, it almost is.

Chanyeol brought the pack and play out with him first and it's already set up in a corner of the guest room. They put Minsu down and Minsu sleeps on, unbothered, his thumb firmly in his mouth.

Chanyeol has the presence of mind to put down one of their own blankets on the bed before he pulls Kyungsoo into his lap and takes him apart with his fingers, and then his cock. It's the best welcome present Kyungsoo's had in ages, and afterwards he sleeps peacefully with the windows open and the sea salt air and wakes up at dawn feeling fully recharged and happy, listening to Chanyeol already awake and talking to Minsu in the kitchen.

Kyungsoo shuffles in, barefoot, knuckling the sleep from his eyes before he slides on his glasses. Minsu's in a high chair that Chanyeol unearthed from god knows where, happily tucking into a spread of fruit pieces and Cheerios, and Chanyeol's over at the kitchen counter slicing avocado onto a bagel that looks burned around the edges.

"Look, Tiny Daddy's awake!" Chanyeol says over his shoulder to Minsu. "Good morning. Do you want breakfast?"

"I want coffee," Kyungsoo croaks in reply, bending down to kiss Minsu hello. "What time did he wake you up?"

"Oh, don’t worry about it," Chanyeol says, which means _very fucking early_. "I got up to pee like, six times anyway. It wasn’t worth going back to bed." 

Minsu reaches up and snatches the glasses from Kyungsoo’s face. Kyungsoo winces as his ear folds but then they’re free, covered in sticky baby fingerprints. Kyungsoo doesn’t take them back. Instead, he leans up against the kitchen island and squints at the screen of his phone instead, tabbing through the chat messages from his mother, the work emails, the half dozen essay-length text messages from Baekhyun about some new album he's obsessing over.

"Don’t do that, you're going to go fully blind if you keep straining your eyes. And you always look so scary when you make that face," Chanyeol says, deftly rescuing the glasses from Minsu and breathing on the lenses. He wipes them with the hem of his tee shirt until they’re clear, then slides them back on Kyungsoo’s face. Minsu protests vigorously at the loss of his toy, but Chanyeol trades him for a piece of banana from the breakfast plate in front of him, and for the moment that seems to pacify him.

"You like scary. You always said my blindness is one of my most attractive qualities," Kyungsoo says, pocketing his phone. 

"Only when you’re glaring at me in the morning and I can’t tell if it’s because you’re pissed I stole the covers again or if you’re just trying to read the dirty magnetic poetry on the fridge."

"You are going to have to stop that soon. I refuse to go to any parent-teacher conferences to talk about Minsu’s bad language. That’s all your fault."

Chanyeol shrugs, unintimidated by the threat. "Baekhyun was the one who made it say 'kiss my taint until your mouth gets tired, then turn me over."

Kyungsoo pretends to cover Minsu’s ears. "Don’t listen to Daddy. He’s filthy."

"Oh yeah? Well, when you can read, we’re going to revisit _tiny Daddy_ ’s lyrics notebook, the black one he keeps in the sock drawer, especially the pages about me—"

"Don’t finish that sentence," Kyungsoo warns. "I'm keeping track of all the punches I owe you. You're already into double digits."

"Daddy, pie appo," Minsu cuts in, pointing at the piece of pineapple on the plate just out of reach. Obediently, Kyungsoo nudges it closer.

"Me too," Chanyeol says. "You're playing favorites. I want pie appo too."

"God, you're annoying." Kyungsoo flicks a piece at Chanyeol, his mouth already open, anticipating. He catches it easily and grins with it between his teeth.

"But so talented," Chanyeol quips, chewing, as Kyungsoo turns away to head to the coffee pot. 

"You're all right," Kyungsoo grumbles. "Any trained seal can catch food like that."

Chanyeol catches him around the waist before he takes a step further and spins him around to press him into the marble countertop of the kitchen island and pin him there with his mouth. Kyungsoo goes a little lightheaded being kissed this thoroughly before he's even had a chance to wake himself up with coffee and a shower. When Chanyeol steps back to release him, Kyungsoo's mouth feels bruised and tastes like pineapple.

"Good morning," Chanyeol murmurs, dropping one last kiss right on the tip of Kyungsoo's nose. Kyungsoo's cheeks burn even though the only witness to Chanyeol's ridiculous affection happens to be their son, who currently finds his breakfast much more interesting.

"Mmm. You said that already," Kyungsoo says, dazed.

"So I did," Chanyeol says, and pushes a cup of coffee into Kyungsoo's hand. 

"Wha's da?" Minsu asks, poking the cube of mango on his plate. Chanyeol slides onto the barstool next to Minsu's high chair and leans over.

"That’s mango. You like mango. Yummy!"

"No, no, no," Minsu says, wrinkling his nose.

"Try? Please try? You'll like it," Chanyeol says.

Minsu gets this delighted look on his face when he realizes he's got a little power. "No, no no no, no!"

"I miss when he didn't know that word," Kyungsoo says into the rim of his coffee mug. 

Minsu picks up the mango and presses it up against Chanyeol's mouth. Chanyeol retaliates and holds up a second piece against Minsu's mouth—a stalemate, until Chanyeol sucks the mango into his mouth, startling a laugh out of Minsu. Chanyeol takes the opportunity to push his own piece of fruit against Minsu's parted lips again and that seems to do the trick. Minsu accepts it this time and chews away happily, juice dribbling down his chin. Chanyeol looks up at Kyungsoo, that stupid _See, I'm the favorite dad_ grin on his face again.

"Yes, you win at parenting," Kyungsoo says, rolling his eyes. 

"I didn't say anything!"

"You didn't have to." He glances at his watch. "What time do you need to be there?"

"Subtle. You just want me to leave," Chanyeol says, standing up.

"I always want you to leave when you’re being annoying. That's not news."

"Cruel, but fair." He shoulders his stick bag and wraps his bagel in a napkin. "Meet me for lunch?"

"Sure."

Chanyeol stands back for a moment, a dreamy sort of smile on his face. "I’m really glad you're here, I can't even—"

"Just go, will you? It's too early for you to be like this," Kyungsoo says impatiently, waving him off.

"I love you too," Chanyeol says, face bright with a megawatt smile, and steals a final kiss on his way out the door.

— 

"I think it's going to be another boy," Chanyeol tells him later that afternoon. They're sitting outdoors at some burger place, watching Minsu make a ketchuppy mess with his fingers all over the tray of the high chair the waitress had brought out for him.

Kyungsoo squints at Chanyeol through the dark lenses of his sunglasses. "How do you know? Dr Kim said it was too soon to tell."

"Just feels that way."

Kyungsoo laughs and hands Minsu a french fry to chew on. "You don't know what anything feels like. Remember you guessed Minsu was going to be a girl? In fact, you nicknamed him after a mythical _female_ sea creature. A nickname which has stuck, if Baekhyun's gifts are anything to go by."

Chanyeol sits back and dabs at the grease on his mouth with a napkin. He looks happy. He's gotten a little bit of sun and his jawline's starting to soften, his cheeks just slightly rounder than they were the last time Kyungsoo saw him. Kyungsoo's trying not to say anything even though he's noticed. He thinks it's charming. Chanyeol will not agree. Chanyeol's always had a stronger sense of his own vanity than Kyungsoo ever did, and he's caught him standing in front of the full length mirror in their bedroom enough times to know that he's already obsessing a little bit about the impending loss of his "perfectly sculpted body" (Chanyeol's words, not Kyungsoo's). Kyungsoo had felt awkward and bloated when he was carrying Minsu, but it was never a self-esteem issue. He was uncomfortable. If he had been bloated and comfortable, it would have been fine.

He reaches out and tugs on the brim of Chanyeol's baseball cap. Chanyeol grins at him, mouth full of food, prompting another admonishment from Kyungsoo (" _Jesus Christ, can you swallow?"—"You know I can, I always do."_ ). He's clearly having a good week, even beyond his excitement at having Kyungsoo and Minsu in California with him. He's had much milder nausea in comparison to Kyungsoo's wild, exorcism-style vomiting spree that lasted months and months before it eased up. Aside from his latest rabid three-a-day obsession with slurpees from 7-11 and a sudden unexplained aversion to cilantro that mimics food poisoning when he tries to push past it, Chanyeol's basically the same as he was before the pregnancy. He hasn't developed any especially bizarre cravings, still hates spicy food and loves anything fried or unhealthy. He says the vitamins the doctor gave him make him queasier than anything, and so far he hasn't become hypersensitive to smells. Kyungsoo's jealous of how easy Chanyeol has it.

"So," Chanyeol says, "should we stick to the cryptid thing? Little Mothman?"

"Fuck you, no. You're terrible at nicknames."

"Babadook? Bigfoot. Baby Bigfoot."

" _You’re_ the Bigfoot here," Kyungsoo says, kicking at Chanyeol's massive size thirteen feet. The bright pink Converse hi-tops he's wearing today make them look even bigger. "Pregnancy makes your feet swell."

"Makes other things swell, too," Chanyeol shoots back, leering. Kyungsoo kicks him higher, in the shin this time.

"We're in public, you deviant."

"This is Hollywood. Everyone’s a deviant here. Who cares? And besides, nobody's listening," Chanyeol tells him even though the couple at the table next to theirs is _definitely_ eavesdropping to the point where Kyungsoo’s able to make sustained, hard eye contact with them before they look away, embarrassed. Chanyeol crams a french fry into Kyungsoo's mouth before he can argue. "What about Chupacabra?"

"That's more like it," Kyungsoo says, laughing while he chews. He pets Chanyeol's stomach with his clean hand. "Hi, little goat sucker. Don't worry, I promise I won't let him name you."

—


End file.
